Through the Eyes of a Mother
“Feed your Children”
When I think of the month of May, I always reflect on my mother, who was pregnant with sibling # 4, and she gleefully said one day” I know what the name of this baby will be”. “I will name this child ’Robin’, because the month of May is the month of the nesting of the Robin’s”. Our baby brother ‘Robin’ was born on May 15th, and lives up to his name with such grace. He is an amazing musician and family man, and immensely loved for his ‘cheerie’, humorous disposition.
Just after Mother’s day this year, I was visiting my son in North Bay Ontario. We embarked on a large project of landscaping over the 2 day visit. In the early morning of day one before my son awoke, I took my coffee down the steps of his deck, only to discover a tiny Robin, at the base of the stairs. I immediately smiled, as I thought of mom, who had long passed, and thought about how I might be able to help this tiny little bird. I looked around and the mother was nowhere in site. I dawned my gardening gloves, and gently moved the little one to a sheltered area by a fence in the garden. I kept an eye out for the baby bird’s mom, and began the arduous task of digging out the first garden bed. Triggered by a conversation I had had with my son the night before, I was reflecting on my motherhood. The baby Robin, made me feel as if my dear mother was reflecting back on my own role as a mother. The baby Robin, made me feel my dear mother’s presence, as often happens with me. I found myself as I was digging questioning my motherhood. Was I the mother that my kids would like me to be? Had I disappointed them...am I giving them enough? Do they really understand just how very much I love them? I found myself weeping as I was digging. The tears were mostly about missing my own mom, who I feel such a deep love for every single day.
Suddenly as I was digging I heard that all too familiar song of a Robin. I was shocked that she came sweeping down and was excitedly feasting like a kid in a candy shop! At this point I had turned the rich soil enough, to expose juicy worms, and grubs and I could see her excitement in the score!
I kept an eye on her to make sure she found her wee one, and from a distance I could see her feeding her delighted baby. Naturally I was thrilled, and again thought of mom. A few moments later, momma bird came back to the garden. Very quickly though I began to sense something. This bird was clearly wanting to be close to me. She came right by my side and stayed with me for 10 minutes at a time. I got a rush of shivers and somehow knew that this mother bird was in fact wanting to deliver a message to me. It was too out of the ordinary to ignore...she was at times inches away from me, as she happily hopped all around me. If there is one thing I have learned in this life, is that there are no accidents. The signs, and answers for the questions we ask within ourselves are always there is we open up our awareness to the signs.
One thing I noticed with this Robin, as she would hop over to me repeatedly with a mouth full of natures best and simply stare at me. I thought to myself...ok mom...what is the message. The robin from time to time after boasting her find with clearly an overflowing beak, would go over to her baby with another feed, she then however would come back to me for another visit as she filled her beak again!
Suddenly a rush of insight came to me. It was as though my mother’s voice was speaking directly to me. “Continue to feed your children darling one”..... Suddenly I had to sit right in the garden and I found myself weeping heavily. The robin came back and stayed close by the whole time I wept. It was so amazing. When My son woke up he stood on the deck and witnessed this happening between the momma bird and me, and he was delighted with the regular visit’s from this bird all day. The following day, the robin once again was with us all day long!
The message for me was crystal clear. I recognized that I do feed my children on a regular basis. I feed them messages from the heart, share with them my hard earned wisdom, as passed down from my mother and her mother before. I am blessed to be the mother of the three most amazing children that could ever be. Thank you to Cameron, Ian and Emily-Jane for the gift of you and all that you are to me. Your Gammie is with us everyday...all we have to do is watch for the signs!